It’s been a while since my last post. Somewhere between unpacking boxes, learning how to drive on tiny one-lane roads, and figuring out which recycling bin takes the milk cartons, I lost my writing rhythm.
And truthfully, it wasn’t just logistics. I hit a wall.
After months of planning and pushing and documenting every step of our move to Portugal, I suddenly didn’t have the energy to write about it — or about anything, really. The reality of living this new life — the paperwork, the bureaucracy, the cultural differences, the unexpected homesickness — hit harder than I expected. And instead of sharing, I went quiet.
But lately, I’ve been reminded of why we started this blog in the first place.
When we first dreamed up Behans Out, it was about documenting our family’s big leap — but underneath that, it was really about something bigger. It was about showing other families like ours — queer families, progressive families, families who feel the walls closing in back in the U.S. — that it’s possible to build a new life somewhere else. That you can choose safety, peace, and connection, even if it means leaving everything familiar behind.
A few months ago, before we even arrived in Portugal, I was scrolling through one of the many “Moving to Portugal” Facebook groups I’d joined and came across a post from a woman whose story mirrored ours almost exactly. She and her wife were searching for a school for their two kids — a place that reflected the same inclusiveness and warmth as the school they were leaving behind in the U.S. Her words stopped me. I could feel her mix of grief and hope, because we’d just been there ourselves — saying goodbye to a community that had embraced our family for three wonderful years (shout out to the Grace School in Providence, RI! We love you still!).
I reached out and told her about Bright International School, which had felt like the right fit for us — a space that celebrates individuality and diversity in the same way. We messaged back and forth for a while as I shared everything I’d learned.
Last week, she reached back out. They’d enrolled their kids at Bright, signed a lease for a home nearby, hired our same immigration lawyer, and already had their visa appointment scheduled. I was overwhelmed with happiness and relief — not just for them, but because in that moment, something clicked back into place. It reminded me that this blog was never just about us. It’s about all of us — the ones daring to imagine a different kind of life.
That connection reignited something I’d lost. It pulled me back to the keyboard, back to the purpose behind all of this.
So going forward, this blog won’t just be a chronicle of our adventures (though there will still be plenty of those). It’s going to be a resource — an honest, transparent, sometimes messy guide for anyone dreaming of doing what we did. I want to talk about what it really takes: the finances, the visas, the culture shock, the fears, and the freedom that follows.
I want this to be a space for people asking the same questions we asked not long ago:
Can we really do this? Will we belong? What if we fail?
If that’s you, you’re in the right place.
I’ll be sharing practical guides, honest reflections, and maybe a few lessons learned the hard way (spoiler: there are many). And I hope you’ll share your own experiences, too — in the comments, in emails, in community.
Because the truth is, moving abroad isn’t about escaping a place. It’s about moving toward a new way of living. And even when it’s hard — especially when it’s hard — I believe it’s worth it.
So, consider this the restart of Behans Out.
Same story, deeper purpose.
We’re back — and this time, we’re writing not just for ourselves, but for anyone brave enough to imagine a new beginning.
That’s all for now. Til next time, #BehansOut
